Online dating is a very different way to date, but many people try to approach it the same as traditional dating. A part of the “traditional” approach that many people follow is that they only want to be communicating or dating a single person at a time. This approach is detrimental to online dating for several reasons which I will cover here.
Online Dating Experience
The first reason is that by dating many people, you will gain experience dating online and should begin to become more comfortable with the process. This can help your dates improve over time, and you begin to understand what to expect to learn more about what you are looking for. For many of us, what we believe we are looking for in a mate when we begin dating online is far different than what we believe we are looking for after we have gone on a dozen or so dates.
The Process Can Take A Long Time
The first reason that dating multiple people at once is beneficial is that the time it takes from when you write your first email to when you have your first date can take a long time. Many people are reluctant to meet very quickly and would rather get-to-know each other through email and phone calls. The problem here is that you will learn far more in the first few minutes of a date than in a month of email and phone calls. You don’t want to insist on communicating with one person only to find out a month later that there is no chemistry. By dating multiple people, you can stagger your dates and the fact that some people want to wait will not hurt your overall dating experience.
You Are Not “Betraying” Anyone
Many people resist this type of dating, even after admitting its benefits, because they feel like they are either lying or being a “player.” This is not the case: both you and your dates are using online dating to find that special someone. The fact that you are meeting other people is something your dates should accept… And it is something you should accept from your dates as well.
Online Dating Becomes Less Frustrating
One of the biggest problems with insisting on dating one person at a time is when you run into a bad date. You may have put weeks into meeting this person only to discover that they lied to you or that there is no chemistry. This results in the sense of hopelessness and the pain of having to start over from the beginning with someone new. When you are dating many people at once, one bad date doesn’t mean you have to start over – you just wait for your next date to come around and hope that it goes better. Dating a single person at a time is one thing that contributes to some people giving up on online dating because they can’t bring themselves to go through another period of excitement only to be let down after the long wait.